Journey away
by LifeChanges
Summary: I held back the tears. "Just leave me alone. I am going to take your advice and get over what our friendship use to be. I need to move on. So I gave you guys your chance to move on as well. So this is goodbye."
1. Prologue

**My first fanfiction this year and one in a long time. So let me see if I can still do one.**

** I do not own Big Time Rush or any of the characters except my OCs**

**Summary: Changes c****an sometimes bring hardships to a person and Logan learns this. So he makes the choice to move on and face through them. To accept it and just leave it in the past and journey on away from it. He will encounter more problems and obstacles but try to continue on. See if he ends up where he wants his life to head**.

**If it becomes popular then I will continue.**

Prologue

Looking out to the sun rise from the balcony was calming to the pale singer. He had been stressed out for a while now with the way his life has been going. He also felt there was something that he lost but could not figure out what it was. He was still part of the band Big Time Rush that was still going strong with three platinum records and a fourth album coming out. The groups lives had been going good for the most part. There were the ups and sometimes the downs the group had to face because they were in the spot light a lot of the time. The down parts mostly fell on Logan to use his brain and help fix or change so that everyone could feel better. Each member of the group had their own part of the group but they also still relied on Logan. Still as the group continued with their adventure, Logan felt something was wrong with the pack of friends. He could not see what was wrong when he looked at them.

Kendall, the born leader relied on Logan to keep him leveled and make sure that his plans did not get out of hand or lead them to something they could not handle. Logan also introduced Kendall to the competitive world of business. The leader was able to handle himself dealing out business deals and compromises. The brainiac was able to steer him into a stable path coupled along with Katie showing the blond some tricks. The greatest favor Logan did for his friend was to help him get over his relationship with Jo. The two broke up and the actress had moved to the East side to continue with her career. Now Kendall was paired in a more serious relationship with a girl Logan used to like but set him up with.

James "the Face" was able to land some acting and modeling jobs and relied on the advice from Logan to get through some of the things. He would go to Logan if he had any problems and the pale genius would listen and help guide him to what was best. The best advice Logan gave him was for him to start dating Camille. Logan knew the two had feelings for each other, even when Logan was dating her. He would see the way the two looked at each other and how they would "accidentally" find each other. So he broke up with Camille and after a few weeks set the two up together.

Carlos the reckless stunt man of the group always did something to get himself hurt. So Logan would be there to reduce some of the damage at the beginning of the stunt and bandage him up at the end. Carlos may have been hyper and quick for somethings but he was slow on a lot of other things. Such as common sense and things that were obvious. Logan was there to help him through most of the things that he did not understand. Whether it be school work or giving him advice on his life. He was finally able to get Carlos to give up on the Jennifers and start to notice Stephanie.

Now Logan was able to finish high school a year and a half early and took some college classes online to keep up his studies. When he was not doing that and the rest of the group were still in class, Logan was running errands for either Griffin or Gustavo. Simple errands such as paper work or active things like dealing with other executives and escorting people around. He got some enjoyment out of the odd jobs because he was able to form some connections with different people in the different businesses making somethings easier with having resources. He proved to Gustavo and Griffin that he was a great asset to the company and not just another singer.

What made things harder for Logan was when he started to go to UCLA for courses to try Pre-Med there. He knew that the Boy Band would not last forever and so went ahead with trying to do what he always wanted to do since before the singing. So he chose to go to a school with a good Pre-Med program. He did most of this on his own time with the other three not paying much attention when they had the free reign to do more things on their own. So while the guys partied it up, Logan worked. He was able to get through all the requirements for Med School and graduate but skipped out on the ceremony because he was on tour. When he got done with the tour he had received some bad news and fell into a small sense of depression.

This depression then brought on an epiphany on what was wrong and what he lost. He lost his friends that would always be there for each other. He noticed that they grew apart as time went on. He did not know when it happened but it had. Before, if anyone of them were in a bad mood, the others would easily notice and be there for the friend without a second notice. Now he was just suffering through his problems alone. Kendall was not there to try and calm him down and motivate him to look on the brighter side but he is instead spending his time with . James would have been there as support and talk to him about remaining strong and not breaking but he was out taking pictures and enjoying the star life. Carlos, who would be there cheering him up with his goofiness and crazy stunts, was trying to be the party master. They were not friends anymore and Logan realized this.

So here the depressed man sat on the balcony watching as the sun rose for a new day and a new life after over a week of the revelation. Logan decided that for once he may just follow up with what his common saying was. He was going to get new friends. He had already packed his belongings while Kendall and James were at their girlfriend's places and Carlos was dead asleep in his room. He had already planned out what his new life was going to be but first he had close the door on his old one. So he spent a good part of the past few days coming up with the best way on departing and he came up with a letter that should help ease the situation to be easy on everyone. He looked at the clock and saw how close to 7 and got up to grab his things from his room. His flight leaves at 10:30 that morning so he got his stuff. As he was leaving, he took the letter out and put it on his side of the dresser. As he left the apartment, he took a last look at the apartment that he had been living in for the past 5 years. He closed the door to it and to his old life. While walking away from it, he thought about what he wrote to ensure the others that he was done.

_To whoever it may concern,_

_That is a weird way on starting this out because it is true. I don't know who would find this letter or on who would have any concern with it and me. Because I have come to see that what I use to know has changed completely. The ones that I used to rely on have changed. Just as I have and it is this change that has forced me to take a good look at my life. What I saw made me realize that things will not be the same._

_Kendall, you were the leader that I looked up to and for some reason, the closest friend. Through the years, this has changed. I don't know you anymore and we are acquaintances now. _

_James, you were the one that always gave me advice on things and I would go to about my love life. Now things have happened to where I cant trust you anymore with what you tell me._

_Carlos, the crazy one and my partner to always be there to show me how to enjoy myself. We cant say that now since the last time we hung out was months ago._

_What we had is gone and I know that it will never be the same. We grew apart and our lives doesn't fit together anymore or I dont fit in your guy's lives anymore. James dream to be a star started it, Kendall's opportunity had us here and Carlos's ambition to be great that moved this adventure or adventure along. I had nothing to do with it and just tagged along. Now I am cutting myself out of it. _

_I had to after dealing with things that has put me in a bad place. A place where my thoughts turn dark and my life becomes unimportant. One that clawed at my heart and brought pain and sorrow. It was the best option for me._

_You guys can still continue on being in the spot light but I am leaving it. I may be gone but you guys have to move on. Though I dont think it would be hard for you guys to._

_Kendall, I was able to set up an audition for the Minnesota Wilds for you at the ice rink next month. I dont know if you still want to be a pro in hockey but here is the chance. If not then Griffin has agreed to take you on as an apprentice to learn more about the competitive world of businesses._

_James, I have set up multiple modeling opportunities and several movie auditions. You just have to call up this agent named Betsy Rockwell who I got to be yours. She is a great upcoming agent that I got to agree to take you on as a client. _

_Carlos, I also got you a try out for being in the pros for hockey. Just go with Kendall if he goes and good luck. If not then I know that the fire academy would love to have a person like you joining to be a fireman. You like to save lives and are energetic so it is the perfect job for you._

_As for me, I am going to go and follow what I said so many years ago. Become a doctor and get new friends. Just as I said before "I've gotta get new friends"._

_I regret it but I have no choice anymore. We are not friends because then you guys would have been there for me. Because I would not have to suffer for what has happened the past month alone. Because I would not be feeling betrayed by the people I once called my brothers. Because I would not have to face all of the issues I have alone. Because I would not be disappointed in you guys and mostly myself for letting this happen. Because I would not be writing this like a spoiled baby that is crying. But I am and it is true._

_I had no one for the past month to hear me out. Someone so I can talk to or vent my thoughts out to. No one to tell me that I might be wrong. To help me through this and get over it _

_We could be friends again in the future but it wont change what has happened and it wont be the same. We are all different now. So it would still be meeting new people. So goodbye to what we had and hello to what we've got. To continue and move on\. So goodbye. _

_Sincerely,_

_Logan Mitchell_

Thinking of the letter and what he meant about it got him to lose track what he was doing. He was able to make it on board without much guilt clawing at what was left of his heart. So he sat in the plane and waited as it took off leaving behind what he wanted to move on from.

**Thanks for reading. Please review and give me comments on what I should do if you have any suggestions. Such as grammar or if you dont like my writing. I will take your ideas into consideration. Remember that I will only continue if I know people want me to.**


	2. Calls

**My first fanfiction this year and one in a long time. So let me see if I can still do one.**

** I do not own Big Time Rush or any of the characters except my OCs**

**Summary: Changes c****an sometimes bring hardships to a person and Logan learns this. So he makes the choice to move on and face through them. To accept it and just leave it in the past and journey on away from it. He will encounter more problems and obstacles but try to continue on. See if he ends up where he wants his life to head**.

**If it becomes popular then I will continue.**

Chapter 1 Calls

Logan's POV

I looked up towards the sky while feeling a cool breeze blow into my face. I laid on my back on the grassy hill I was on and watched the clouds moving through the empty skies. It had been two weeks since I left Hollywood and started the new chapter of my life. I am now moving on from that part and hopefully the new start would go without any problems. As I was thinking more about my new life I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

I answered without checking who it was. "Hello"

"LOGAN" and all too familiar voice shouted as I closed my eyes. He started to rant really fast what I was guessing about how I disappeared because I caught the phrases " ran away, problems, friendship, lies and note."

"KENDALL!" I shouted to stop him from continuing. "Now calm down and take a deep breath."

"Calm down, CALM DOWN. WHY SHOULD I CALM DOWN WHEN I FIND OUT MY BEST FRIEND JUST UP AND ABANDONED US..." He was cut off as I heard some other noises and I think fighting.

"Logan? Its Carlos. James is calming down Kendall right now." I rubbed my face with my hand wondering how that was going.

"Where are you? You dont mean what you wrote, right? Because we are still friends and we are all still close." I wanted to laugh at that statement but I restrained myself.

"Carlos, put me on speaker phone because I want all you guys to hear this." I waited as I heard some button being pressed. "Can you all hear me?" I heard a grumbled out yeah from Kendall, a yes from Carlos and I guess James was remaining quiet.

"What I said on that letter" I paused knowing what was going to happen. "was all true." I pulled the phone from my ear as yells and shouts came out of it. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!" "WE ARE YOUR FRIENDS" "I AM ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU" "BULLSHIT"

I waited for a few minutes and took a deep breath. "SHUT UP!" I shouted into the phone. " NO, YOU GUYS ARE NOT EVEN THERE A QUARTER OF THE TIME LET ALONE WHEN I NEED YOU GUYS. MY GOD I left two weeks ago and you guys did not even notice until now. For the past year or so, I had to rely on myself. The only times we ever spoke was when you guys needed something from me. When it came to what I needed, you guys could not be there for me"

"We are there when you need us. You just never do." James finally spoke directly to me with the other two agreeing with them.

"Really." I said sarcastically. "So when I asked you to pick me up from downtown after I lend you my car, me taking a taxi instead was you being there for me. Or how about when I finally got my car back the next day, it was after you totaled the side door from trying to impress the director of the movie you were going after. No the greatest moment or should I say moments you were there for me, was when Camille and I were still DATING, you were being a great FRIEND and got her PREGNANT." I heard a gasp after that sounded feminine so I guess Camille was in the room. The line was quiet from what I assumed was because the room was shocked.

After a few moments I was using to calm down before I did something I would regret and taking deep breathes, someone spoke up. "Okay, just because one of us fucked up does not..." I cut him off before he could say anything else because I still was angry. "Don't even act innocent Carlos. At Griffin's last party, I was not the one who was drunkenly making out with MY girlfriend in one of the rooms." That shut him up.

Again with the silence. I needed to really end this call so that I can get over this. "Listen, I know that you guys feel hurt but imagine how I felt when you guys did those things and many other things that hurt me. That is why I had to leave and what the note said was true but..." I never got to finish as Kendall came back on. "Okay Logan, I guess that SOME of us have not been real friends lately but that does not mean that you can pack up and RUN AWAY. We are STILL your friends even with all the mistakes we made. So just tell us where you are so we can come get you."

"Actually Kendall, like I said in the letter, we are not friends at all. We have not been friends for months, even when we were on tour together on that bus. YOU have not spoken to me directly for over six months and every time I tried to talk to you, you blew me off for Melanie or for something else. When ever I came to you for advice, all you would say to me was "GET OVER IT AND MOVE ON". What kind of advice is that when your FRIEND needs you."

"Logan, you need to calm down and get..." "Dont even say it. You remember that that was the last thing

you said to me. Do you remember what was the subject." There was a pause and he said "No. Why does that even matter?" I wanted to laugh as tears came down my eyes.

" You wouldn't remember because before I even uttered a single syllable, you turned towards me and told me to " get over it and move on". Now let me ask you a question. What would I have done if Mama Knight ever passed away?" I asked as I saw Laura climbing up the hill.

"I will enlighten you because I am your BEST FRIEND." I wanted to laugh at that. "You would be there for me and make sure that I don't go off the deep end. Making sure I was okay and that I did not do anything that I would regret. Take care of all the preparations and keep an eye on Katie. Be there so that..." He trailed off for a bit and his voice got quieter. " I did not have to suffer alone... Logan, why are you asking me of this?" He ended in a worried tone.

I wrapped one of my arms around Laura as she rested her head in my chest. I still held the phone in my other hand. "Because... when my mother passed away over a month ago, you just told me your new catch phrase." I held back the tears. "Just leave me alone. I am going to take your advice and get over what our friendship use to be. I need to move on. So I gave you guys your chance to move on as well. So this is goodbye." I hung up the phone and threw it on the ground as I held Laura close. Rocking her as she started to fidget a bit. I sat there in that position while staring at the girl in my arms for I dont know how long. My phone rang again and took me out of my trance.

This time I looked at the caller ID and answered. "Hello"

"They call?" She said.

"Yeah." I let out a breath. "And how are you holding up?"

"I am fine Katie." I smiled "And how is your sister doing?" "Laura is fine, she is in my arms right now, sleeping."

"How she holding up?" Asking more about her best friend. Both were friends just like me and Kendall use to be. Actually they acted more like sisters, which made Katie my little sister also. I did count Katie as my sister.

"She is fine. She is going to be staying with me and I am going to be taking care of her. How are you?"

"I am fine but I wish I could be there for Laura. I wish that your mom did not have to have had Huntington. Maybe you both would not have to suffer."

"I wish that too Katie but that is why I am going to become a doctor. So that I could help and prevent others from suffering."

"I know." She whispered. "Logan, sometimes I think you take on too much. You dont have to always sacrifice yourself for others happiness. What about your happiness."

"I am happy when others are happy." I said but she countered me with "and you falling into depression when the others were too happy to pay attention was you being happy also." I had to stop myself from lashing at her.

"Katie, if I continue this way, maybe I can find a cure so that Laura would not have to suffer anymore. I got to go now but tell your mom I said hi and send my love."

"Logan, I know that." She said defeated. "Just make sure that you take care of yourself as well. Bye. Love you big bro that's too smart."

"Love you too little sis I wish I never had." I chuckled at our farewells and the line went dead.

I hugged Laura closer to me like she was the most precious thing in the world and to me, she was. I let a tear fall as my little sister started to fidget a little bit more.

END

The next one will be about Kendall, James, and Carlos.

**Thanks for reading. Please review and give me comments on what I should do if you have any suggestions. Such as grammar or if you dont like my writing. I will take your ideas into consideration. If not then I know that people really dont like my writing and I will discontinue this story.  
**


	3. Interactions

**My first fanfiction this year and one in a long time. So let me see if I can still do one.**

** I do not own Big Time Rush or any of the characters except my OCs**

**Summary: Changes c****an sometimes bring hardships to a person and Logan learns this. So he makes the choice to move on and face through them. To accept it and just leave it in the past and journey on away from it. He will encounter more problems and obstacles but try to continue on. See if he ends up where he wants his life to head**.

**If it becomes popular then I will continue. Thanks for the reviews.  
**

Chapter 2 Interactions

**Katie's POV  
**

I had just gotten off the phone with Logan while I was sitting in his former room. I was visiting my brother Kendall after not seeing him in a while. The guys had all chipped in to buy Mom and I a house while they stayed in the same apartment 2J. Ever since a year or two ago, he has been spending less and less time with me and Mom. He drifted away from our family and it became to where I could not rely on him like I use to.

Luckily enough, Logan noticed this and decided to fill in Kendall's spot. Logan took some time out of his hectic schedule to come and help me and Mom. He would spend dinner with us at least twice a week and he would help me with anything I needed. Being there if I needed anyone to listen to my problems or just there to spoil me. He was always there for me but now things are different and he isnt going to be here. He told me to call him at anytime but I know that he has to watch over Laura.

Laura Isabella Mitchell is my oldest friend. We both have a bond with each other that is more like sisters and that is what we call each other. That is why Logan being my brother makes sense. We three are all siblings and Kendall use to be a part of it but not anymore. I miss Laura and I wish I was there along with her and Logan in Cambridge. Me and Laura are the same age but because she started to suffer from Huntington disease that she inherited from her mom. Her body suffers from chorea or uncontrollable movements.

I got up off the bed and started to head to the living room to go and see what the rest of the boys were up to. As I got closer to the door, I could hear screaming and yelling coming from the other side. I took a deep breath and braced myself for what I was going to witness. I grabbed the knob, turned it and pulled.

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Kendall yelled

"HOW IS THIS ALL MY FAULT? YOU ARE TO BLAME ALSO!" James yelled back. "YOU ARE THE ONE THAT STARTED IT BY SLEEPING WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND AND GETTING HER PREG..." Kendall was cut off as Carlos shouted "SHUT UP AND CALM DOWN."

"Now if James really got Camille pregnant when Logan was dating her, which was two years ago, we never saw her being pregnant or having a baby around. So Logan could be wrong." Carlos tried to reason with both of them as I walked into the room. They were all sitting down with Kendall across from James and Camille while Carlos was sitting to the side. Both boys turned to Camille and James to see if Carlos was right. They both had on a guilty face to prove that Logan was the one that was right.

"By the look on your faces, it is true then. What happened to the baby?" Kendall stated suspiciously.

"I...I h-had ….I g-go..." Camille was nervous and on the brink of tears with all the pressure she must be feeling with the two boys staring at her. James cut in to save her. "She got an abortion." He said shamefully.

The shocked faces James saw made him lower his head. "Why would she get an ABORTION for. That baby was a living thing and had the right to live. Even if his or her parents are BACK STABBERS." Kendall said with disdain and fury as he stood up to yell at them. James just sat there.

"We both decided it was the best choice because we both had careers and were to busy to be parents. We thought.." "WELL YOU THOUGHT WRONG. This just proves you are the one that made Loga..."

"DONT POINT THE BLAME ON ME AGAIN KENDALL. You were the one that told him to get over his MOTHER'S DEATH. You were the insensitive jerk that caused him to think we were not his friends any more. You were the one that ign..." James started getting angry because of all the blame being put on him. He started to stalk over to Kendall pointing at him to blame while Kendall stood his ground and glared at the approaching brunet.

"Would you two STOP IT." Carlos got in between the two.

"Dont try to be the civil one Carlos because you were the last one to hurt him." Kendall said now turning his attention to the Lation.

"Yeah, you are the one that pushed him overboard and caused this to happen." James added glaring at his old friend.

"DONT YOU DARE PIN THIS ONE ME." Carlos said getting angry at being accused after trying to be the civil one and having that blown in his face. They started bickering with all of them standing and shouting accusations at each other. Camille was still on the couch curled up into a ball feeling ashamed at the situation.

I was getting sick and tired of this. All three just lost a friend and they are acting like a bunch of children throwing the blame on the other person. I was fed up with this.

"Would you three QUIT IT!" I shouted and caught their attention. "I mean, I cant believe you three. Your closest friend who has ALWAYS been there for you is gone because you guys could not even pay him a single second of attention. You all chased him away because of your selfishness. He has always been there for you to go to and then you ignore him when he needs you the most." I was on a roll venting out my anger.

"Katie we kn..." Kendall tried to calm me down but he just infuriated me more. "NO you dont KNOW. He is just as much as my brother as you are maybe even more with the way you been acting for the past year. I noticed what was happening to him and I tried to do the best that I could but I am his LITTLE sister that is five years younger than him and I cant do much. You guys were suppose to know him better than me because you guys grew up together and did all sorts of things together. Yet he had to grow up the past few years on his own."

"OKAY Katie we get it." James's turn to try and calm me down. "NO you guys don't. Logan had too much to deal with and you guys just added more to his burden. He had to deal with family trouble, school, the music business and then you guys falling apart. You guys dont even have the right to be his friends with they way you guys have been acting. You guys dont even care to think about how he feels but instead try to make yourselves feel better."

"We do care abo..." "No you dont Carlos. Because if you did, then I would not have to call him daily and make sure that he is okay. I would not have to worry about him and Laura. I would not have to think of the pain he has. Because if you guys did care, he would be here right now but he is not."

"Wait, you talk to him _daily?" _"Yes I call him to see how they both are doing." I answered Kendalls question. I had let a lot of my anger out with that rant. "So do you know where he is?" "Yes, but I am not telling you guys anything." That statement wiped the hope off their faces. " You guys are going to cause more harm than help. Logan does not deserve that. YOU ALL do not deserve him." I said ending it with venom in my voice. I got up and left the apartment needing someone to hold me.

I quickly left the Palmwoods and went to my boyfriends house. I would have preferred Logan but my boyfriend Jamal would be okay. Logan did not trust him but I did and he would make things better. As I entered his small house I started feeling a sense of foreboding.

* * *

**Third Person's POV**

Logan was out and about in Cambridge. He had just left his sister up in their condo while he was out getting food from the diner around the corner. He was thinking about his sister and what his future plans were while he was not paying attention to where he was going. He then suddenly ran into someone and knocked them down.

"I am so sorry, here, let me help you up." Logan gave the girl he bumped into a hand. " I was not paying attention to where I was going. I know I should have but I wasn't. It sometimes happens but I always try to pay attention to my surroundings but I guess my mind was wandering. Again I am so sorry. I will..." As Logan was ranting on, the blonde girl he knocked over was looking at him questioningly like she knew him from somewhere. She finally recognized him and was shocked and happy at the same time.

"LOGAN" She shouted to gain his attention and stop his rambling. Which it did.

"Yeah that's my name. How did you kno..." When he finally got a good look at her, he was surprised.

"Jo?"

TBC...

Finished another chapter.

**Thanks for reading. Please review and give me comments on what I should do if you have any suggestions. Such as grammar or if you dont like my writing. I will take your ideas into consideration. If not then I know that people really dont like my writing and I will discontinue this story.  
**


	4. Sibling Thoughts

**My first fanfiction this year and one in a long time. So let me see if I can still do one.**

** I do not own Big Time Rush or any of the characters except my OCs**

**Summary: Changes c****an sometimes bring hardships to a person and Logan learns this. So he makes the choice to move on and face through them. To accept it and just leave it in the past and journey on away from it. He will encounter more problems and obstacles but try to continue on. See if he ends up where he wants his life to head**.

**If it becomes popular then I will continue. Thanks for the reviews.**

Chapter 3 Siblings

"Jo?" Logan was surprised to see the blond here in Cambridge. "What are you doing here?"

"I come down here with a friend so that she can visit her friends and family. I just wanted to take a walk and see the sights. What about you. Why are you here?"

"I am going to Med School out here." Logan said looking a bit sheepish when Jo's smile grew bigger. "So now you are a Harvard man. I am so proud of you Logie and I knew that you could do it. How are the other guys." This question made Logan freeze up but hid it before Jo could notice. "They are fine and are doing their own thing. Um... I got to get going now. I am suppose to be buying food for me and my little sister that is living with me."

"Oh, I am sorry Logan. How about we meet up again another time. You know what? My friend and some of her other friends are throwing a party in a few days and it would be so great if you could come by. I mean the people there are some that I do not know well but with you there, I wont feel much lonely." Logan was about to say he couldn't but then saw her face turn into a pout and could not resist.

"Yeah, I think Laura might have something to do that night. I should introduce you to her later but I will see you at the party. Where is it at?" Logan could not deny his nature on trying to make everyone happy.

"I will call and tell you the address. You still have the same number right?" With a nod from Logan she grinned and kissed his cheek and a "Bye Logie." before walking off. Logan just shook his head and continue to grab food for him and his sister.

Different Place Different Time

Katie was curled up in her room nursing a bruise on her ribs that was turning blue. Her eyes were red and puffy from all the crying. She buried her head in her pillow as she thought of the earlier events.

_Katie walked into Jamal's house after unlocking the front door with the spare key he gave her. She looked around the place and it seemed that everything was quiet and looked like he was not home or was sleeping. She was about to just go lye on his couch when she heard a thud from the bedroom. Jamal only lived in a one story house with two rooms and she heard the noise come from Jamal's room that was around the corner from the living room._

_She decided to go see what it was just in case it was Jamal making noises while he was sleeping. She got to the door and was about to knock but instead chose to just walk straight in. She was still feeling the foreboding feeling before she entered the door and when she got through it she found out why. There on the bed, was Jamal cheating on her with another girl that she did not know. _

_She was shocked beyond words and was on the verge of crying but her body just froze where she was and would not move a single muscle even an inch. Jamal did not notice her until a few minutes later and cursed and that was when she pulled herself together and felt rage overtake her._

"_You FUCKING cheater. How could you cheat on me after we've been together for over a year." She was screaming at him. "You two-timing son of a bitch. I cant believe that you could have been the one person that I trusted. You are nothing but a good for nothing sleaze ball that loves to fuck anything you see. You are worthless scum that does not even deserve to live. Go ahead and..." She was turning around about to storm out the place while ranting when she was tackled to the floor. She tried to wrestle the man off of her but he was stronger than her. He ended up straddling her waist with his head lower down to be a foot away from her face and him gripping her arms down._

"_You know what Katie, I am happy that you saw this. You and your high mighty self who acts like she is always in control and can do no wrong are getting on my nerves. Yeah, I have needs that you cant seem to provide for, so I went and found someone who can satisfy me. But if you want, I can give you another chance to be..." Before he could finish his statement, Katie was able to free her hand and slapped him across the face. _

"_You shouldn't have done that sweet heart." He then back handed her while she was still the floor with him on top. He went to rip off her shirt but she struggled and was able to punch him in the face while still fighting. He then went to punch her in the ribs that brought a lot of pain. Jamal then went to try and take off her shirt again but blacked out after something hit his head. He slumped over to the side out cold. Katie looked up to see who saved her and saw the girl that her boyfriend cheated with._

"_Come on, we have to get out of here before he wakes up." The girl said grabbing Katie's hand._

It turned out that Katie liked the girl a lot. Her name was Crystal and Jamal was doing the same thing with her as he did with Katie. Crystal was able to drive her back to the Palm Woods after Katie said she was fine and did not want to go to the hospital. Now Katie was just trying to nurse her wounds from what happened. She was also trying to calm herself down but the day was an emotional roller coaster for her. First missing Logan then having to deal with Kendall and the other two. Then she went to go see her boyfriend to get comfort but ended up making it worst with what she experienced there. Shock, betrayal, anger, and fear. Then she had to go through more when she had nobody there to help her. She remembered when she got back to the place.

_Katie dragged herself through the door of 2J but felt pain in her ribs from where she got punched. She then looked up to see that the place was empty. She then dragged herself through the place to her temporary room. When she got there, she fell on the bed. She reached for her phone that was in her pocket and was thinking of someone to call to help her. She decided to see if her mother could help her but when she called no one picked up. She knew her mother was back in Minnesota taking care of Katie's grandmother. So she would not be here to comfort her. She then went to call one of her brothers. She would have called Logan but she did not want to bother him because he already had too much stuff going on with his life. So she called the other one._

_It rang a few times before someone picked up._

"_Hello"_

"_Kendall" Katie said while trying to hold back the tears. "Where are you?" She got out before grabbing her hurting ribs._

"_I am at Melanie's. Listen, I know that I am suppose to take care of you but I am going to be staying here for a while and work through some things. Make sure that Carlos and James know you are there and are taking care of you. I got to go now so I will see you when I do. What ever it is you called for, I am sure that you can handle it and move on. If not, then go ask James or Carlos for advice." He hung up after that without giving Katie a chance to say anything. This just brought more pain to her heart._

It has been a few hours now and no one has come by the apartment. She heard from her room the apartment phone ring a few times and people leaving messages. One was James saying he was taking Camille out and staying with her to help her cool down from the earlier episode. Another was a guy calling to remind Carlos about the party that they were suppose to be going to. This meant that no one would be there the whole night. She was alone in the whole apartment while it was getting darker. A place where she use to have fun and joy at but now all she could feel was loneliness and pain. She curled up into herself. She did not notice that her phone had rang twice because

Back to Logan

Logan had just returned back to the condo and had already woken his sister up and got her to eat. Now they both were just watching TV together till it was time to go to sleep. Logan started to feel something was wrong but could not figure out what it was. He racked his brain for what could be wrong and then he started to think of his other little sister. He decided to call her to see if anything was wrong. He tried twice but no one picked up. He was going to try again but his phone started to ring and he picked it up thinking it was Katie.

"Katie?"

"No. It's me Jo. Sorry, were you expecting a call from her?"

"No, I just have a bad feeling and think it concerns her." Logan said rubbing his face with his hand showing that he was a bit worried.

"You dont have to worry. You know how Katie is, she can take care of herself. So I am calling to remind you about the party on Wednesday. You remember that, right."

"Yeah Jo, I remember. You only just told me about it three hours ago and begged me to come."

"I did not beg you. Fine if your dont want to come then you dont have to." She said with a huff.

"Okay okay. You did not beg me. I just decided to come. So where is it." He said with a shake of his head.

He then spoke to her for a few more minutes and was able to get the address from her. They ended their conversation ten minutes later. The brunette then looked at the time and saw that it was past nine. He then looked down at his sister and saw she was fast asleep and decided to carry her to her room. He laid her in bed and tucked her in. He was about to step out of her room but she spoke up.

"Lolly." Laura's nickname for him. The best thing from a doctor is their lolly pops and Logan was trying to be one. Also it helped that both his nickname and his real name started with Lo. "Can you stay with me." He smiled and nodded while pulling up a chair towards her bed. Till she fell asleep, he would stay there.

He looked at her and decided to do what he always did to put her to sleep when they use to live together. He sang a lullaby.

_The world spins round and round _

_But I am holding you in my arms_

_I will let nothing come to you but love and joy_

_To make you happy and full of peace_

_I will be your guardian for eternity_

_Watching you forever and ever and ever_

_Come with me and be at peace_

_Watching the skies change _

_Hold my hand and we will fly_

_Our dreams soar through the sky_

_But I will always be here_

_Doing anything for you_

_(For you)_

_I will fight_

_(For you)_

_I will cry_

_(For you)_

_I will live_

Before he went on, Laura had already fallen asleep. So he just got up and kissed her on the head and quietly stepped out. Thinking about his sister brought back the thoughts of his other sister. He decided to give her one more try. He called but again she didnt pick up but he decided this time to leave.

"Katie. Sweety. If you are there, pick up. Okay Rainy. I am just calling because I am worried about you and feel that you need me. I dont know why but I know that I will always be there for you. So just call me for anything that you need. I always have time for you. So just call me. I will try to come see you if I can as soon as possible. Love you Rainy." He hung up after that.

Finished another one.

**Thanks for reading. Please review and give me comments on what I should do if you have any suggestions. Such as grammar or if you dont like my writing. I will take your ideas into consideration. If not then I know that people really dont like my writing and I will discontinue this story. Please inform me if you have any ideas.  
**


	5. Pregnancy Scare

**My first fanfiction this year and one in a long time. So let me see if I can still do one.**

** I do not own Big Time Rush or any of the characters except my OCs**

**Summary: Changes c****an sometimes bring hardships to a person and Logan learns this. So he makes the choice to move on and face through them. To accept it and just leave it in the past and journey on away from it. He will encounter more problems and obstacles but try to continue on. See if he ends up where he wants his life to head**.

**If it becomes popular then I will continue. Thanks for the reviews.**

Chapter 4 Pregnancy Scare

Logan was walking through the CVS trying to buy some groceries so he and Laura would not have to keep relying on getting take out for food. He let Laura walk ahead of him while he was pushing the cart. He had already told Laura that he was going to go out tomorrow and found out she was going to be staying with a friend that she had already made with the short amount of time they had been there. He still had not gotten any reply from Katie and was hoping that Kendall would not forget about her.

The brunette continued down a new isle and found it to be the one with medications and some medical supplies. He then passed by something that made him pause for a bit. He started to feel his mind drift towards a memory he wanted to suppress but knew that a person should not suppress their memory or feelings all the time or else they would come back worst than before. He had to first get to a place where could cool down in a less crowded area. So he went to the bathroom in back of the store. While Laura followed him after seeing him just abandon the cart and headed towards the back of the store.

By the time he got to the restroom, he could already feel the frustration flowing through his body and betrayal follow behind. He grabbed the sink with both hands and held a tight grip to it while the memory came forward.

* * *

FLASHBACk

_The brunette had just entered the apartment after just getting done with running errands for Gustavo and Griffin. Logan was happy that he was able to get it done in an hour instead of the Two hours it was supposed to have taken. Then there was no traffic on the streets which saved him another hour. So he had two extra hours to spend by himself and do things he wanted to do while everybody else was out._

_Mama Knight took Katie out for a girls day while the other three boys had their own things to do while they had free time. Kendall with playing hockey with Carlos at the local ice rink and James out pursuing his acting career with my girlfriend Camille. The two have been spending a lot of time together trying to get some parts in different movies or TV series. Funny thing was that if she is not with Logan, she is with or runs into James later. . _

_Logan just wanted to relax for a bit and decided to go to his room and read up some medical terms. One of the the things that helped him relax. He went down the hallway and was about to pass James and Carlos's room when he noticed it was cracked open with some voices coming out of it. He knew that Kendall and Carlos would not be done with their games until 7 that night but it was only 5. So that left James to be the one home. Logan would have continued to his room and ignored James but the second person, James was talking to sounded like his girlfriend, Camille. They sounded stressed out by the sound of their voices._

"_How can this be happening. We are too young to be in this sort of thing. I mean we are only 18, barely adults. We..." "I know that. I know that this situation is fucked up. I know that what we did is one of the most awful things that we have ever done. I just want to forget about..." By the sound of it, Logan assumed they were practicing lines for a TV drama._

"_James! What we did is something we cannot forget. I mean, how are we suppose to forget that I am PREGNANT!" Okay James's character has the same name as him and Camille's character was his love interest. May be a good show that Logan might actually watch. "Are you sure about it. I mean sometimes there are false alarms. You could be wrong and nothing is going to happen to us." James was saying in a panicking voice mixed with a bit of hope." No James. I tired five different tests and got it confirmed by a doctor. It is true and we can't hide the growth of my stomach from everyone. Especially from my boyfriend and your best friends."_

_Okay now that turned out different adding more chaos to the mix. Camille's character was cheating on her boyfriend with James and they are having a child together. The genius was now wondering who was going to be acting as her boyfriend. "Don't you think I know that. We can't even raise the baby with where our lives are at. Especially with us lying to everyone. I mean, Logan my best buds. He has always been there for me and would never do anything to be betray us. So this is only making me feel worst." Now Logan was smart enough to know that his earlier thoughts were wrong. He started to feel sick with the thoughts now going through his head._

_Part of him,the angry part of Logan wanted to storm in there and yell but the one part that felt betrayed, wanted to disappear and believe none of this ever happened. He wanted to drown out the memory of the moment. Believe it was all a lie that his mind was playing on him. While his inner turmoil was going on, the couple were now starting to talk about their future plans on hiding their sins from becoming public. Especially to the person they did not know was just outside the door frozen as a statue. In the end Logan's body fell under auto pilot and walked away to head back outside towards his car. He drove away from the place and ended up going to a secret cove that he found a few years back when he first got to drive by himself._

_The cove was just some of the ocean being leaked into an oval area that was shielded by tall rocks. It formed a small lake that was surrounded by sand and grass. It was a peaceful place that Logan found and would always come to when he could not handle things or when he wanted to escape from something. He parked the car a good 15 minute hike away and came through the small pathway that led to his secret spot. Once both his feet reached where the edge of the water met the land, he fell to his knees and let out a painful cry._

_His scream was him letting his emotions break through. From all the frustration he had held back while he stayed in LA. The pressures of being in a boy band and dealing with all the emotional bagage it brought. The feelings he held back and restrained from showing so that he could be there for his friends. All of it came out in his pain screeching cry. _

_As he screamed, he started to now notice all the signs that he had ignored. His mind connected the dots to show that what he wanted to believe was false was the truth. One of his best friends had been going behind his back with his girlfriend. All the auditions that he knew were fake or that they did not even go to. The times when Logan would accidentally see them together having lunch together while he was out running errands. Finally all the times Camille canceled their dates but James always being gone that night coming back in the morning smiling._

_Two of the people he trusted most in the world, had crafted a world of lies and cheating to fool him. To string him along and thinking nothing was wrong. Tonight was the night where the glass walls broke and the truth came out. Logan just continued to scream until his throat ran dry and he could not scream anymore. His tears rained down his face to join the salt water below his body. Logan fell asleep on the sandy beach to awake when the sun rose above the horizon. _

_He stood up and dusted himself off of the sand. He straightened up and looked at the rising sun. The sun rise always helped calm his nerves and steel them when he was going to do something that he feared. The sun rise always meant something special for him. It was during this time his parents met. It was during this time when he and his sister were born and it was during this time when he first met his friends when they were young. There was many other times when the rising of the sun brought good fortune for him, so he embraced it for the moment. For he was starting his life over at the moment._

_He reached into his pocket and took out a promise ring that he was going to give to Camille. He was actually going to bring her out here and give it to her but now things changed. He looked at then clenched his fist. He pulled back his hand and then brought his hand forward, catapulting the ring into the ocean. He let his body calm down and relax. The scenery was helping him sort through the things and calming him down. First he was going to give the two another chance of coming forward at least. _

_

* * *

_

Logan was now breathing hard from the memory. Seeing that pregnancy test made his mind revisit the night. He did give the two a second chance but they had wasted it and never came forward. Worst, the two had decided to abort the child right after Logan broke up with Camille that next day. Both knew his views on abortion. Even if he was to be a doctor, he never wanted to take a child's life, even one he would never have known. He felt even more betrayed that they went against his belief of every life being sacred.

He took deep breaths and turned the faucet on to splash some water onto his face. He started to picture being back at the cove to help calm himself and relax from the panic attack he had because of the memory. He was starting to regain his composure when his sister spoke up.

"You okay Lolli?" His sister asked concerned with it showing on her face. "Yeah, Ellie." He said using his nickname for her because of her initials. Laura Elise or L.E. " I am fine. How about after we finish shopping, we go straight to the beach and have ourselves a picnic?" He smiled seeing her face brighten at the idea because she loved the ocean. The two set out to finish their task so that the rest of the day they could relax. Logan hoped that nothing else bad would happen.

TBC...

**Okay for the next few chapters, I am going to revisit in falshbacks what happened between Logan and the guys. OR if you guys want, I can throw in some good memories to help ease choice if you review so please review**. **Thanks for reading. Please review and give me comments on what I should do if you have any suggestions. Such as grammar or if you dont like my writing. I will take your ideas into consideration. If not then I know that people really dont like my writing and I will discontinue this story. Please inform me if you have any ideas.  
**


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